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Hello, Bandit is the second episode of Season Five of the Showtime series DEXTER, and the fiftieth overall episode of the series. It first aired 3 October 2010.

Dexter tries to focus on the children; blood evidence leads Dexter to a new serial killer; Debra ends up on Quinn's doorstep; Miami Metro investigates the Santa Muerte murders.

Summary

Dexter swims in the pool as he reflects on the seven stages of grief. Killing a man in a restroom, he thinks, was his way of working through the anger stage, but he has no time for the other six stages now that he’s a full-time dad.

Dexter and Debra bring the kids back to the apartment. Cody seems cool with the whole situation but Astor is upset. She thinks it's overcrowded and wants to go home. However, Dexter wants them to start over in a new apartment and is looking for one. When Dexter says he will swing by the house tomorrow to pick up some clothes and things, Astor insists on going with him. Dexter, though, tells her it's not a good idea because of what happened to her mother there.

Dexter finally sits down with the FBI to be interviewed. When he loses his temper at their questions, the agents admit that he has an iron-clad alibi for Rita's murder. They remind him that during the time she was killed, he was at the raid on Arthur Mitchell's house. They just want to know why Mitchell targeted Rita. Exasperated, Dexter replies, "Because he's a serial killer?"

Maria informs Dexter that he needs to take a week off from work.

The Feds tell Maria that all they have to go on is the name "Kyle Butler" (Dexter's alias). The name rings a bell for Maria, and she remembers that a man by the same name was murdered a few weeks back. The Feds plan to have a sketch artist meet with the Mitchell family and work up a composite.

While Angel is bringing Maria's mail to her, he drops it and accidentally sees one of her bank statements. He's stunned to discover that she has almost $270,000 in savings.

As Dexter is choosing which moving van to rent, he spots a 14-footer with a blood stain on the floor. He chooses that one.

While Dexter is packing up his house, Elliot Larson stops by and talks to Dexter about the demands of being a single parent. Elliot's presence annoys Dexter so much that he’s tempted to stab him.

Cody and Astor's grandparents help move stuff into the apartment which has become a madhouse. Astor continues to be miserable that she can't go home, and complains because Dexter didn’t bring her the right clothes for school. Cody, however, says he likes it there because it’s like "camping."

That night, Dexter and Harrison each have trouble sleeping. He takes the baby into the moving van and examines the blood. He finds a large spatter on the inside consistent with blunt force trauma of someone kneeling. He also notices what looks like bloody handprints. Dexter jumps online and finds the last person to rent the van. It's Boyd Fowler who listed the sanitation department as his address, and works for the department of dead animal pick-up. Dexter tests the handprints from the van and it's human blood.

Dexter plants a dead raccoon on a road to lure Boyd to him. The two chat for a bit, during which Boyd reveals that he's lived in the same house for twenty years. Boyd scrutinizes the raccoon and states that it was killed elsewhere and dropped on the road. Having killed it, Dexter smiles at the remark. Dexter thinks that Boyd is peculiar, and decides to further investigate him.

Quinn, Debra, and Angel arrive at the scene of a murder in a Venezuelan neighborhood. They have only the decapitated head of a female victim. Quinn believes it is consistent with a drug killing. Masuka says the head was cut off while the woman was still alive. Quinn offers his couch to an exhausted Debra. A local cop, Cira Manzon, tells Debra that the candles and icons around the head indicate the Santa Muerte cult, and she thinks the woman was killed with a machete. The body is soon found on the other side of the park.

Dexter can't figure out how to help the kids deal with their loss. He looks up Boyd online and discovers that he served time for assault with a deadly weapon, and inherited his parents' house. Debra arrives home and Dexter tells her that Cody and Astor are going to see a grief counselor the next day. She reminds Dexter that he is going to be a single dad with three kids.

With Dexter on the couch and the kids in the bed, Debra goes to Quinn's place to sleep. He tries to kiss her but she isn't having it. He tells Debra that she’s welcome to stay there as long she wants, and he'll keep his hands off her. The next morning, she still won’t acknowledge they had sex in Dexter's house.

During breakfast, Astor has a meltdown based on the number of plates after it reminds her that her mother is dead. She tells Dexter that she wants to go home. Cody is upset that Dexter and Astor are arguing so much and storms off.

Based on a suggestion from Debra, Masuka proves that it was a machete that decapitated Nina. He says that he hates working with blood, after which Debra tells Angel that Masuka really likes working with blood. Angel asks Debra if she thinks a married couple should share their money, and he doesn’t like her answer.

Quinn and Debra are called to another body, this one the result of a shotgun wound to the head 24-hours ago. The dead man is Francisco Alfaro, the husband of the decapitated woman, Nina. At this crime scene, there are no elements of Santa Muerte. Officer Cira Manzon shows up and Debra tells her that she was right about Nina being killed by a machete.

Dexter breaks into Boyd's house, which has a barrel of dead animals outside. Inside, he finds a loaded handgun and a locked door to the attic. While he snoops around, Boyd comes home for lunch and Dexter is forced to hide. As Boyd listens to a self-help tape and looks for soup, Dexter finds a numbered lock of human hair and sneaks out undetected.

Debra and Quinn check out an open house for Dexter. Quinn pretends they are a couple to Debra’s annoyance.

Dexter follows Boyd to the middle of nowhere and watches him dump a barrel into a marsh. He suspects it contains dead animals but, before he can check it out, Debra calls to say the kids never went to school.

Dexter finds Astor and Cody at the house staring at the bathtub where Rita was killed. Dexter apologizes, but Astor doesn’t care and accuses him of ruining everything. She wants to live with her grandparents, not him.

Quinn asks Maria if he can check out the Kyle Butler sketches. Each are somewhat different based on which of the Mitchell family members gave the description.

Angel confronts Maria about her secret bank account. She says it's "not a secret" and explains it's for her retirement. Maria implies that Angel isn't smart with his money which offends him. Angel walks out of her office and announces to his co-workers that drinks are on him later.

That night, Dexter tells Debra that Cody and Astor are going to live in Orlando with their grandparents. Cody wants to stay in Miami with Dexter, but Dexter told him it was important to be with his sister.

Debra calls Quinn and finally acknowledges they slept together.

Quinn is piecing together the sketches and recognizes the similarities between Kyle Butler and Dexter.

Sergeant Lopez approaches Angel at the M Street Bar and makes inappropriate comments about Angel's wife. This infuriates Angel, who is quite drunk. A physical altercation takes place, which leads to Masuka getting slugged as well.

The kids are ready to leave with their grandparents for Orlando. Cody is crying and begging to stay with Dexter, but Astor pulls him away. Dexter tells Astor that her mother loved her, and so does he.

It's still night when Dexter returns to the marsh to check inside Boyd's barrel. When he pops open the top, he finds a dead woman inside. He looks around the marsh and notices four more barrels.

Meanwhile, Boyd clips a lock of hair from an unconscious woman and electrocutes her inside a barrel.

Quotes

  • "It doesn't matte how much I love my children, I'm still a creature of the night." - Dexter to himself
  • "It's like when you get on a plane. They tell you if the oxygen masks come down to put yours on first before helping the kids. I have to take care of my needs too. Otherwise, I risk spinning out of control. And that's not good for anyone." - Dexter to "Harry"
  • "Hey, fuck puddle. What are you doing? I came over here to sleep, not to have your fat little sausage fingers all over me." - Debra to Quinn
  • "It's a rule of nature. Leave some old bed springs out in the middle of nowhere, and soon, it'll be joined by a refrigerator, couch, car engine." - Dexter, as he watches Boyd dump a barrel at the marsh
  • "It's not Dexter’s fault." - Cody to Astor

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